"Vienna, you stink!": 13 TripAdvisor reviews that think Vienna sucks!

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     / May 11, 2016
          • If you were to write a bad TripAdvisor review about something in Vienna, what would it say? Let us know on our Facebook page, or leave a comment below!
            Vienna Würstelstand's  says:
            Stephansdom? What a boring church!
            Vienna's old historical city centre? What a big, dirty ashtray!
            Some people are really hard to please, and as Ms Taylor Swift wisely remarks, 'haters gonna hate.'
            With the tourist season ramping up, we bring you 12 TripAdvisor reviews that think Vienna sucks. Ouch ...

             

            Vienna, the city



            Thank God for Bratislava! Otherwise, there would be literally nothing to do in this part of Europe.
             





            We wish we'd been there when the pen hit this person in the head – what are the chances!?
            (We're really wondering why the Austrian government never responded) 



            Spanish Horse Riding School



            Only recommended if you're a 'die-hard horse trotter.'



            Schönbrunn Zoo



            What did they expect? It was Fajita & Cocktail Friday the night before. The animals weren't sick, they were hungover!




            The State Opera



            "At one point, audience members even threw their empty beer cans at the conductor. My eyeglass almost fell into my champagne!"
            PS – We apologise for our 'uneducated' sense of humour.
             


            Schönbrunn Palace



            hole in one!
             


             


            Putting the subtle racism aside for a moment, we really must have missed the 'pooping' part of the tour.
             

            Naturhistorisches Museum



            God damn all those taxidermic animals in a nature history museum!
             

            The restaurants



            A fascist restaurant: where there's no menu, and the waiters dictate what you eat. And if they say you enjoyed it, then don't dare to argue or you'll be locked up as a traitor of the taste ... we mean, state.

            But seriously, this sounds absolutely horrible, nevertheless, we'd like to complain about your spelling, Sir!




            The hotels



            As long as the bed was the only thing you had to strip in the morning, we'd say you got away just fine.
            And commit suicide because you had to strip your bed? Really?! There's a 1st world problem if we ever saw one!

             




            These bashful, prudent foreigners. They just don't understand us, "nasty Europeans who love to flaunt their bodies to everyone without any self-respect."
             

            Stephansdom



            Basically this is the stance of every altar boy, ever. Too far?
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             / May 11, 2016
                  • If you were to write a bad TripAdvisor review about something in Vienna, what would it say? Let us know on our Facebook page, or leave a comment below!